Wedding Scones a.k.a. A Big Mess
We’ve all heard of cupcake wedding cakes, right? A tower of dainty, delicious-looking cupcakes iced in pink and white and silver? What you may not have heard of is the wedding scone. There’s a good reason for that.
Delicious looking they may be, but scones are certainly not dainty. They are messy and lumpy and generally quite hard to make pretty. Despite this, last week I set out to make the prettiest, weddingy-est scones that have ever been seen, as a pre-wedding gift to my future (now present) sister-in-law. I failed.
Inspired by the numerous recipes flooding the blogging world, as well as the pretty purple colour I imagined the dough would turn, I decided on blueberry scones.
The scones themselves turned out OK, but the blueberries were pretty bland – not at all as sweet and succulent as I’d imagined. Maybe they weren’t quite ripe enough for cooking.
The real mistake I made was in trying to decorate them. I knew they would never quite match a cupcake in prettiness, but I needed to make them weddingy somehow. Armed with white icing, pink sugar hearts and edible glitter, I set about turning what were some reasonable looking scones into something that a child might have brought home from nursery. Not quite the look I was going for.
‘It’s the thought that counts’, I said to myself, transferring the mess on the plate to a tupperware box and packing it into my hand luggage, where I thought I’d be able to protect the scones from harm. I was wrong.
After 40 minutes on the bus, 2 hours in Dublin Airport, an hour and a half on the plane, half an hour at Gatwick and 45 minutes in the car on the way to the restaurant where I was to present them to their recipient, very little remained of the decoration. The icing was now primarily coating the inside of the tupperware, leaving just a sticky, glittery mess coating each scone. The scones were slimy to pick up and, when I later sampled one, slimy to eat, as the icing had completely soaked through. The blueberries were still bland.
I shoved the scones back in the box, and the box back into the car and went into the restaurant, never mentioning my unfortunate mishap to my new sister. Later, the scones went into the bin where they belonged.
The wedding, unlike the scones, was perfect. The bride was beautiful, the groom was handsome, the food was tasty and everybody was happy.